Clean as clean can be.

My loving sister took my kids yesterday afternoon and returned them this afternoon.  Kenny and I tried to go on a date but he was so embarrassing that I had to cut it short.  No, I'm kidding.  We had a ton of fun but decided that going out to a bar after dinner is no longer fun since we don't live in walking distance.  And the next movie wasn't set to start for over an hour.  So, we went grocery shopping and bought massive amounts of alcohol with full intentions of drinking a LOT when we got home.  One drink in, we both passed out.  We are so awesome that it hurts sometimes.

This morning, I had a great idea.  I would clean BOTH of the kids' rooms to surprise them.  I figured since Mae's room looked the worst, I'd start there.  Two hours later, her room was spotless.  I took a short lunch break, a couple deep breaths, then launched myself into Kyler's room.  Holy Jesus.  My son is disgusting.  There was an expired...smoothie?...I think....on the shelf next to his bed.  There was a skull from an unidentified animal (cat?) on his floor (when questioned about this, he said he found it in the woods...ew!) and there was a (hold your breath for this one) DEAD frog under his desk!!  This one may actually not have been his fault because as it turns out, our house seems to be the breeding grounds for tree frogs.  I found a dead one under the piano bench a couple of weeks ago.  Still, gross.

Both kids are happy about the results of my day-long cleaning.  Mae is most excited that you can see her closet floor.  Kyler is forever content now that his books are organized.  And me, well, I'm exhausted.  Cleaning for hours is tough stuff, especially when you have to gasp and/or scream over something you've uncovered about every fifteen minutes.  Today's events have traumatized me enough to cover the next few months.  I think this is why as we get older, we are expected to clean up after ourselves.  We are not astonished in the slightest at our own frightening habits, but for someone else to happen upon them?  Terrifying for both parties.